Sunshine

In my ongoing series of self indulgent posts, I would like to talk about Alzheimers. I fear I may eventually suffer Alzheimers. I would hate to forget the most meaningful moments in my life.

First time I could whistle: In front of Hixon house
First kiss: after Homecoming.
First time I made a tackle and heard my name announced over the loudspeaker: Senior year of football versus Yuba City High Honkers

Awwwww. Sweet memories.

I would also hate to forget what I’m physically attracted to. We all have our standards. Just imagine, having the Heimers, and falling in love with some woman who doesn’t meet my pre-Heimers qualifications. Egad! No thanks! I don’t want my grandchildren saying, “Wow! Grandpa has no standards!”

So, for posterity, and in the event I develop Alzeimers, I’m mapping the females “attributes,” most appealing to moi. From 1-20, they are.

1. Smile
2. Abs
3. Hair
4. Ass
5. Teeth
6. Eyes
7. Chest
8. Navel
9. Toes
10. Nose
11. Shoulder
12. Thighs
13. Eyelashes
14. fingers
15. Ears
16. front of neck
17. back of neck
18. side of neck
19. calf
20. chin
21. knee
22. elbows
23. tibia
24. armpit
25. appendix
26. Adam’s Apple

Of course, if I have Heimer’s, I will have likely forgotten where these things are, so here’s a handy picture for the future me: