If a movie advertisement, print or otherwise, ever quotes Mark S. Allen, rest assured, that movie is terrible. Allen Quotes are the mark of death.
Doctor, what's the matter with my movie?
Please, sit down.
Level with me Doc. Is it polio?
I'm afraid it's much worth.
Rickets?
Rickets isn't worse then polio.
Sorry. Rickets is bad though, right?
Well, sure, but it's easily treatable. Just need a little Vitamin D and Calcium.
Oh. Well, then what's worse then polio?
The Black Death.
Ok. Doctor! Does my movie have the Black Death?
No. I'm afraid it's much worse. Please, sit down.
Please....(sob)
I'm sorry to tell you this. Your movie has Allen.
Noooooooooo! Oh god no! The movie was so young! It was just released in the theaters!
I'll leave you alone with the filmstrip.
My little movie was a donor.
We know. We'll be in to collect the frames later.
See! Allen kills. He's a lighthouse on the shore of suck. Don't approach. Flee!
1 comments:
Sadly... this is true. I've met this guy. He's the proverbial jerk-off. He thinks because he does some little stint on Good Morning Sacramento that his shit don't stink. He's rude and obnoxious.
Fuck you Mark S. Allen. Fuck you right in the ear.
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